Age is just a number’ has been reduced to a hashtag today, but in real life, it is often hard to accept that you’re growing old, especially for women. Of all the things that help you look youthful, a black and shiny mane perhaps tops the list. Remember the TV ad where a teenage boy calls a young woman ‘aunty’ because she has grey hair? After she dyes her hair, he calls her ‘didi.’ Advertisements are trying to convince women that they look less attractive if they have salt and pepper hair, hence the popularity of dyes that ‘cover your greys.’
However, there is a tribe of women who do not bow down to the popular beauty standards and are proud of their silvers streaks. They not only feel liberated but also inspire others to follow the trend.
Social media too, has been encouraging these women. Popular Instagram handle @grombre — a radical celebration of the natural phenomenon of grey hair with 125 followers — shares photos of contributors in various stages of greying, including teenagers who have experienced premature greying.
Celebs like Zosia Mamet, Lady Gaga and Rihanna too have been sporting greys. Silver streaks, frosted grey tips, metallic hair extensions, global lilac-ombres have given birth to the popular #GrannyHair trend. Closer home, actresses like Ratna Pathak Shah, Jaya Bachchan, Nafisa Ali (before she lost her hair to cancer) and others have been showing off their greys. We catch up with Pune-based women who talk about their silver pride.
BEING HERSELF
Priti Raja, 51, founder-director of Sare Jahan Se Acha Foundation, loves eating colourful cakes and wearing vibrant colours, but when it comes to her hair she likes to sport her greys. She is proud of her age and her silver crown. This attitude of acceptance and comfort with her greys have many of her friends calling her ‘Pretty Priti.’
“You can imagine how it feels when a woman is called pretty and that too in her own skin without having to fake and conceal her greys,” says the mother of a 23-year-old daughter and a pet parent of an eight-year-old furry dog. She started spotting a few greys in her 30s and used henna to colour them.
“As time passed, the numbers of greys increased and I disliked the colour of mehendi on them. The style trends were changing big time, but my work and home responsibilities too were my priorities. So I gave it a serious thought: Does my grey bother me or impact any of these things? The answer was ‘no’,” says Raja adding that she feels respected for her grey hair, “I want to be myself and love myself the way I am.”
Initially, Raja’s daughter and her sisters wanted her to colour her hair. “But it was only a matter of time that my family, friends, neighbours, colleagues and even strangers walked up to me to compliment my natural look,” she adds.
NOTHING TO HIDE
Ina Hathi, a volunteer at Robin Hood Army, who is proud of her greys, believes that beauty brands want to sell their product, but we don’t need to buy their ideas.
“We can think for ourselves,” she asserts. The 49-year-old hasn’t coloured her hair for the past six years. Ask her what encourages her to flaunt her silver hair and she says, “I didn’t want to hide anymore. I’m proud of being 49 and it’s a natural progression of life so I stopped colouring. And I feel empowered. I don’t have to deal with a lot of nonsense, and because I’m grey, I get some respect.”
Speaking of social media trend #Grannyhair which is leading to a positive impact, Hathi says, “I think that’s wonderful. We are constantly pressuring ourselves to mould and ‘reach’ society’s ideas of what beautiful is. But we are beautiful now. And we are absolutely fine and acceptable and lovable too. Initially, my friends and family hated my hair and there was absolute negativity about the greys. But now, I get a lot of compliments instead of criticism.”
To other women, she says, “ You are beautiful and you are fine just the way you are. So why are you hiding?”
WHY SHOULD WE BE JUDGED?
Nandini Kulkarni, 53, a homemaker, has never coloured her hair because she feels it is natural to age.
“I have always felt that it is a natural thing and never felt the need to colour my hair. Also, I feel grey hair suits our age and looks beautiful,” says Kulkarni, adding, “No one has pressured me to colour my hair, but I have often been questioned by people of my age why I don’t colour my mane.”
Kulkarni feels that women are judged too much for their appearance, and often, tend to succumb to such expectations. She feels that if women want, they must absolutely feel free to sport their greys.
“Everyone in our society has an obsession with jet black hair but my kids tell me how they love my hair and call it the salt and pepper look,” chuckles Kulkarni.
PROMOTING BODY POSITIVITY
Gayatri Rathod, a 33-year-old freelance photographer, is determined to not colour her mane when it turns completely silver. “I have a few grey strands and a lot of people ask me why I don’t colour my hair,” says the mother of a three-year-old.
But why would she when she feels comfortable to sport her greys! “It is not the sign of ageing — even kids have grey hair these days. Besides, I don’t want to use chemicals on my hair,” says Rathod who has been a victim of body shaming post childbirth. Her agenda isn’t just to encourage women to flaunt their silver crown, but also to promote body positivity.
“People made fun of me and I even cried at times. I hated seeing myself in the mirror. But now I have become confident of who I am. I have reached a point where I have realised that how others look at me shouldn’t bother me. If my grey hair makes me happy, I don’t need to impress anyone. There are good people around who don’t judge me for my looks. This made me love my self all over again,” adds Rathod.
