I’m a non-achiever in a family of successful people

Bobby Das
Sunday, 27 August 2017

I am a misfit in a family of achievers. My father is a senior vice president in a reputed multinational company. My cousins and their spouses are either doctors or chartered accountants or principals of reputed institutes. All are immensely successful and well off. They buy expensive clothes, have luxurious cars, and go for international holidays. I have completed my BA Hons in English and a Diploma in Computer Science (only because my father forced me to). I tried teaching jobs but couldn’t get good remuneration as I have not done BEd and was not inclined to do it either.

I am a misfit in a family of achievers. My father is a senior vice president in a reputed multinational company. My cousins and their spouses are either doctors or chartered accountants or principals of reputed institutes. All are immensely successful and well off. They buy expensive clothes, have luxurious cars, and go for international holidays. I have completed my BA Hons in English and a Diploma in Computer Science (only because my father forced me to). I tried teaching jobs but couldn’t get good remuneration as I have not done BEd and was not inclined to do it either. I did enjoy teaching though. I like kids and enjoy doing fun activities.
I’ve had limited success with my travel blogs. I like sketching and craftwork — making birthday cards or gift items for my friends and family. I guess that is the only thing I am good at. My family is pressurising me to get married as they feel a girl should be having a family of her own by now (since I’m 27 years old), but I do not wish to do so till I succeed in something. I’m frustrated, please help me.

‘How to be successful?’ This ‘need’ has spawned many business endeavours; that it has now evolved into an industry, ranging from books to YouTube videos to blogs to radio and television programs across the globe. Self-help authors to corporate gurus, everybody has a take on success. And as many definitions. So ultimately it all boils down to how you personally define success.

To make it simple, let us define success as the positive culmination of efforts in the quest of certain goals. That goal could be money, fame, qualifications, fancy designations, material acquisitions, professional achievements, or it could just be happiness and contentment, which I feel is the ultimate quest of all human beings. Or not.

So let’s consider what you like doing. You like sketching and the creative arts. Why not take this up professionally? Develop the artist in you. Sell your ‘gift items’ to friends and relatives, do online marketing and/or set up a boutique of niche items and paintings.

Since you like spending time with children, you can establish a fun school where you teach them various forms of art and craft. Find a place, like a small garage or a room in your house will do to start with, do it up creatively within a reasonable budget and invite the kids in your neighbourhood for some free sessions. Once it takes off, you can monetise the project.

Marriage can open up a whole new world for you, where you would not have to carry the burden of  constant pressure of ‘achieving’ success. And the happiness that one can achieve from a stable and exclusive relationship is undeniable. Success lies in the understanding of your needs and wants, and realising the difference between the two.

(The writer is an image consultant and corporate trainer. If you have queries for him, send them to features@sakaaltimes.com)

Related News